Thursday, April 9, 2009

Real Resolutions for Moms: Part Twelve

Read previous posts in this series by checking out Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five, Part Six, Part Seven, Part Eight, Part Nine, and, Part Ten and Part Eleven.

"I will by my actions and my speech let my children see a mom love their dad, for by this will my children sense family stability at a time when marriages all around them are crumbling."

I have to chuckle at God's timing. This same topic was the focus of my MOPS group this morning. How to keep your marriage strong. Why it's your responsibility to keep it strong.

I must admit that when people start telling women what to do to make their marriage affair proof, I'm the first to stand up and question why the women always get these "lectures." However, the Lord was revealing something else to me today in that conversation. He began to show me that although I'm right in recognizing that it's not a two sided issue, I can, and should, be doing my part to strengthen this relationship any way I can. Although my husband shares in this responsibility, that doesn't release me from putting my 100% effort in as well.

So in a sense, how dare I blame him for not recognize my unspoken needs. How dare I demand more. If I were truly loving my husband, my response wouldn't be more demands.

Now, I'm not saying all wives should be doormats. Rather, we should continually be working on our communication and lovingly strive to better ourselves and our relationship for everyone involved: husband, kids, and us.

I see how reassuring it is to my kids when my husband and I are moving insinc with one another. There are times when we will embrace in the kitchen, just to hold one another. And when my kids see that, their faces light up. Both the 3 year old and the 1 year old come running to be a part of our hug. They instantaneously know that's a safe place to receive love. It's innate in them. They recognize it and embrace it.

My marriage is far from perfect. There are fights and annoyances. But we are careful to express love between us in front of the kids. Through this they have seen a marriage built on commitment and a mutual respect and honor for a living God.

"Lord, remind me to place my marriage above myself. Remind me that cherishing it and nurturing it is far more important even than the things that I'm "doing for the kids." By cherishing this relationship I'm giving to them a gift that is far above many of the tasks that I allow to rob my time."

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